Many students have begun to notice the simple joys in life have gone missing after the recent ENES100 project showcase when one team, named Team New Gods (TNG) showcased their God-killing machine. TNG was assigned the fire mission, but designed a robot that was able to perfectly accomplish all five missions, even being able to fit under the limbo stick and roll over the log.

TNG had initially planned on using this project to insert themselves into high positions of power by declaring themselves as “the new gods,” but their plan had backfired.

“The robot really developed a mind of its own. After killing God, it imprisoned our entire team and forced us to do its bidding. Our two computer engineers have to write a program that will allow it to take control of other devices remotely. Our mechanical and electrical engineers have been tasked with building an improved body for the robot, without the three kilogram weight limit. Also, our bioengineer was asked to give the robot a soul??” said civil engineering major and TNG team member Free Mason, who has been stuck doing CAPTCHAs for various websites the robot wants access to.

In previous semesters, many teams sacrificed their robots to Testudo following the final showcase, but every other teams’ robots killed themselves immediately following TNG’s showcase.

“I guess it’s kind of a relief to know that God ever existed in the first place. But honestly what kind of cruel deity would allow for the creation of a three credit course that requires that much work,” said chemical engineering student William Nye. 

“I’m just excited to get through the first few weeks of next semester without hearing about a bible study group everywhere I go,” said Jewish student Nada Christian.

“What am I supposed to do with my life now?” asked Pope Francis.

It is yet to be announced whether the death of God will impact the remaining few days of the semester, but seeing as every single world government has already collapsed, you can probably expect a few changes.

Image Credits: Andrew Simone